Throne.

Its not goodbye

2010-07-03T18:20:00.000-07:00

And what if I never kiss your lips again
Or feel the touch of your sweet embrace
How would I ever go on
Without you there's no place to belong
Well someday love is gonna lead you back to me
But 'til it does I'll have an empty heart
So I'll just have to believe
Somewhere out there you thinking of me

CHORUS:
Until the day I'll let you go
Until we say our next hello It's not goodbye
'Til I see you again I'll be right here rememberin' when
And if time is on our side
There will be no tears to cry On down the road
There is one thing I can't deny It's not goodbye

You'd think I'd be strong enough to make it through
And rise above when the rain falls down
But it's so hard to be strong
When you've been missin' somebody so long
It's just a matter of time I'm sure
But time takes time and I can't hold on
So won't you try as hard as you can
To put my broken heart together again

CHORUS

Still cant sleep

2010-06-27T13:27:00.001-07:00

Sumtimes we want to be love n most of the time we just break it. i get so confused that i always ask myself where am i going.. its been 2 straight days tt i cant sleep.. its not bcos of some work reason its bcos im missing sumone, Zirah had gone far away from me.. she even told me to fuck off from her life, i guess i totally tortured her to come back to me. i know its stupid orang dah benci tu blah jelah, but im totally stubborn i keep on lovin and beggin her to come back.. life is short why must i be sad, njoy life kalau ada tu ada kalau tkde then takdelah..

I always ask myself whats my mistakes n till now i couldnt find the answer, is it bcos she ade guy lain or bcos of the way i treat her.. cmonlah kite dah setahun lebih, i wann stay longer cos i did lots of memorable stuff with u, and i just cant forget it..

till now i still hope u can comeback to me.. but i know u nyer orang cam aner, once u make ur decision, u wont change it..

I still smile when i look at ur picture walaupn it hurts, i guess u r way betta without me..

Every story has a beginning, a middle and an end..

I just can forget u.. i totally admit tt i still in love with u no metta how bad u treat me after our break up..

Guess u r truly my dream girl..

I will always wait for u.. waiting for ur msges and call..

I Love u..

Keep Smiling..

I miss Tt..

This is the path im taking

2010-06-18T22:18:00.000-07:00

This Liriks from 1 of my fav indo band.. its is kol Demi Cinta or For Love..
And the lyrics is totally what im feelin rite now.. Its about my relationship with her..
If shes reading this plz do read the liriks cos its really suit us..

Maaf, ku telah menyakitimu

Ku telah kecewakanmu

Bahkan ku sia-siakan hidupku

Dan ku bawa kau seperti diriku

Walau hati ini terus menangis

Menahan kesakitan ini

Tapi ku lakukan semua demi cinta

Akhirnya juga harus kurelakan kehilangan cinta sejatiku

Segalanya telah ku berikan

Juga semua kekuranganku

Jika memang ini yang terbaik

Untuk diriku dan dirinya

Kan ku terima semua demi cinta

Jujur, aku tak kuasa.

Saat terakhir ku genggam tanganmu

Namun yang pasti terjadi

Kita mungkin tak bersama lagi

Bila nanti esok hari

Ku temukan dirimu bahagia..

Izinkan aku titipkan rasa cinta kita selamanya..

This How It end.. But Still I Miss YOU

2010-06-16T04:11:00.000-07:00

I remember every moment with her.. the time we smile, the time we cry, the time we laugh.
Every morning i used to wish for another special day.. every nite i wish for her voice to be the stars leading me to the gateway of peace.
But now that shes gone all i had left are traces of happiness, love and care. I never admit defeat in my entire life, but im defeated.. i had lost a great war, a war to protect my relationship.. a war to save a princess so that she can live happily in my arms, but sadly i had lost it..
Hazirah Johar.. the only girl that make me smile in my years of sufferin in NS.. Ns is hard but she makes it easy, she was always there..
She wants me to move on.. I wish i can dear, I wish i can..
But im afraid i cant.
I know its my fault, i should have treat u better.. And i failed as a boyfrewn and i failed as your soulmate..
But without you life isnt perfect..
Maybe this is the pain i have to suffer, i will endure it.. i try my best to live.. i try my best to smile again..
But this smile is nothing compare to the time im with you..

You are all i need. If you are reading this.. i want you to know im Sorry.. I really sorry dear.

I will always keep u in my heart.. 1 yr and 1 mth is not easy.. we gone through so much together.
No 1 can replace you.. No 1..

Z.A

Best GF

2009-09-12T21:32:00.000-07:00

Zirah dear, thankz for making my life special all this time..
5mthx together, never in this 5mthx i menyesal being with you..
I know kekadang i behave like a jerk..
I sumtimes pissed you of and it affects ur studies..
I realise that you deserve better..
You deserve a prince not me!!
But i deserve a princess like you..
I can never be a prince,
sal that prince must be someone special to be standing beside one of the most beautiful princess in the world..
But i thank GOD plus you cos the opportunity given..
This 5mths you had been great to me..
I had never feel so in love before..
Even my mum say she never see me as crazy about a girl before..
Nikita is nice, But Zirah is the best..
Zirah is like an idol to me..
Shes my everything..
No matter what she did at past..
I still Love her..
No Matter what you guys think or say about her..I still Love her..
No matter if i dun see her like how you guys see ur gf everytime..
I still Love her..
And even if one day we had to be seperated..
Hazirah will always be my best gf in my life till the day i got married..
BCOS I LOVE ZIRAH SO MUCH

~Love Vs Anger.. Love Wins~

2009-08-15T21:16:00.000-07:00

For once in my life i can say that i had lost in a battle

I know i always get angry, and will start to pissed off

I tend to release my anger to the people nearer to me

One of the innocent ones is HER..

NUR HAZIRAH

My 1 And Only Angel..

I pity her most of the time..

I know she always try her best to be a great girlfriend

But somtime things did not go as what we're expexted to turn out..

Things will suddenly change its path and the ending of the story is different..

We can only plan, but once we start writing different ideas come..

So my girlfriend gets angry bcos of this..

She wants to be there for me..

But sometimes she just cant..

That same goes to me..

When i started loving her, i plan to be the best of all of her past love..

This love story will be one of the best..

Not one of them..

But is the best...

Both of us always have different ideas..

Zaie is a guy yg cemburu kuat..

He try to hide it but Zirah sees everything..

Zirah is a girl yg...

I dun wanna say it bcos its my gf..

You guys reader dont have to know bout her..

Know about me!! Its my blog...

So both us see things differently..

Im so much positive thinker..

My angel know bout this..

On the other hand shes the other side of me..

She never think positive much..

But kuat cemburu is already negative Zaie!!

And every we 'bertengkar' we tend to say hurting words like..

Break! I Hate You!! You Are The Worst!!

But after that we still love what we had..

I love what i had..

I Had Her..

Walaupun gaduh or what.. I Did have her..

I did get a chance to Love Her..

I Did get a chance to be happy with her..

I may say the hardest thing...

But to continue hating or pissed off..

I Cant!!

Bcos my love for her is more than anything breathing in this world..

She will be my future..

I Love Her Now, Tomorrow, Forever...

~I Never Thought I Need You More Than Ever~

2009-08-09T01:46:00.001-07:00

No! was not my answer when people ask me..

"Do you love her?"

I answer with confident.

"Yes,I Love Her"

She is my heart, My Soul and my life..

I will do anything for her..

Even things that i never did before..

I want to know what my girlfriend loves and like..

I always thought that i knew her..

But theres something hiding inside her heart waiting to come out..

The only thing i have to do is find the key..

I may have her love and misses..

But i still did not have the precious treasure that is hidden deep within her heart...

Making her smile is dreams..

Making her cry or mad is a sin!!

But i never hide from mistakes..

Somtimes i did thing without thinking

Just hoping that she'll be 0k with it..

But No!!

Shes not ok with it..

I never feel so in love before..

But i feel it when i step into her castle gate..

When i see dead leaves and roses, when i see the princess is being curse to sleep

Am i the hero?? Or just the gardener of the castle..

Should i kiss her and wake her up??

Or just ignore her??

But because my love, i wanna see her eyes..

So i kiss her.. and she wake up..

Everything was beautiful..

But things did get nasty..

And tts when she forbid me to enter her castle ground..

Life was hard outside the castle..

I wanna be inside..

But if this is a punshment by the highness..

I will follow...

I will wait till the day she send her guards to find me in a forest..

To call me back to the castle..

And wish that i belong there...

2009-08-09T01:46:00.000-07:00

~5 Days MC~

2009-07-02T22:41:00.000-07:00

Tis is a damn Shocking matter.. bcos im not looking forward to a 5 days stay at home..
Ya everyone wanna stay at home, but no one in earth thought tt by having a running nose and headache polyclinic will give you a 5days mc..
What will i get if i say i got H1N1?? i should be at home forever...

I went to polyclinic on thursday cos i felt sick on wed nite.. and it continued killing me the next day..
I told mum im goin to report sick, but both mum n dad did not agree.. i spent 15 min explaning to them how tired i am watching the highway every single day..
At last they say ok..
So i went to polyclinic accompanied by both mum n dad.. how manja i was..'they just want things to go well for me cos i always mess things up'..
Went i reach the door to the 'the hell'.. i was given a mask..bcos i got flu and its 1 of symtoms(the spellin is it rite?)...
they sent me to a place where i say a few of my member..i mean the mask gang sittin waiting to be given An MC...

I waited for 30 mins...
Then my number flash out, i knock the door and went it..
The doctor was a female, my male hormones is exercising...
she interview me... askin how i got sick and what im doin rite now..
Then she told me tt she want me to stay at home for 5 days..i was so damn really very very unbelievably shocked!!
But i took it.. haha

I show it to my parents, they are shocked too..

But i still go out Yesterday..
Go WHere??

hehe.... shh...

~I Have To Passed This Just For YOU!~

2009-06-21T00:41:00.001-07:00

Firstly, i would like to thank you..

For all your support that you had given me..

Im lucky to have someone so beautiful like u..

To be my Girlfriend..

You never ask for anything, you just want me to be the best for you..

And sometimes im so weak that i cant do it..

But now i have to prove something..

That i can passed my TP for my love one..

I dun wanna be a mistake for us..

I wanna be a fate..

I dun wanna pull you down anymore..

Syg, I pass My TP...

And if i did..

U are the 1st girl i wanna see...

I love u Zirah..

Thax For Everything..

I wont let u down!!

~BBQ At Pasir Ris Park~

2009-06-21T00:21:00.000-07:00

At last i get the chance to blog.. seriously i miss bloggin!!
Ok tts it, actually i miss my laptop..!!

I had fun yesterday... i had bbq pit with the Jose Ruiz.. for your info, Jose Ruiz is my club name...
Its not really the best team but we have players tt can really play well...
So yesterday was the bbq session..
The pit start at 2pm but i came at 3.30.. i got to get my haircut and i proceed slowly cos confirm some of them are even later than me..
When i reached there my prediction was rite, i was one of the earliest..
The food were amazing...we had hotdogs, stingray, dengdeng, satay,sweet corn, fishballs and marshmellows..
And Dun Forget CHICKEN WINGS....SLurp

We bbq and bbq... i had lots of fun.. we talk cock..laugh at the stupiest..
Talk about Ns.. bcos im the only army down there others are policeman..
We pack up at 10pm..
I went straight home cos i was tired like fcuk..
And then otw home.. my baby kol.. i miss her, after hearing her voice suddenly im back alive.. haha..
but we cant tok long bcos of her house rules..
And i think i did make her sad yesterday.. i will tok about tis in the next post..

Anw tts what i did... i had fun lah..

~Keep Saying Bad Things, I'll Give You Bad Dream~

2009-06-13T20:27:00.000-07:00

I had been livin stressfully tis few days.. cant concentrate on my life at all
everythings been jumping up and down, totally exhausted with sumone..

I did not have a great week with dear.. We argued alot this few days, i dun know why..
Is it bcos i cant represent myself at all to her? or is it i ask alot of stupid things..
e.g: meetin her tis weekend...
But i nvr know tt she could be totally stress up with me.. I never wanna stress her, but why she always claim that i did?? whats the point??

I had try my best to be there for her... But sumtimes things happen i myself did not know why... i always thought by sitting down and talk like gf and bf, things would be handy.. but i dun know why its hard for her...
I never ask more than her love.. is it too hard?? She always says tt sum1 else outthere is betta than her!!
But i love u, till i drop dead infront of your eyes i will still hold on to ur hand.. Bcos i only adore u..
There may be millions outthere, but u r the only one i like..
I hate it when she says that.. i just feel why must she be so humble where else she knw tt i cant take my eyes of her... Relationship is not easy, its not like taking a candy from a baby..
But if others outthere can do it, we can do it...
They are human, we are too...

Another prob appear... That sickening girl..(Sheeka).
i thought she wont disturb me anymore.. but zirah dear prediction was rite.. she still fucking stubborn...
She said bad things about my girl which i did not accept...
And as i was so mad yesterday.. i slap her..
A tight one!! She cry in pain..
It was not a game or joke.. it was true.. i slap her...

You know what sheeka.. i always respect u.. if i remember our past.. i always remember the sweet ones..
You were one of the best.. u always make me happy.. but u choose to end our r/s...
I did nt choose tt.. you always buang me, then kutip me balik.. im not a part time guy...
If you rasa zirah take me from u, like how u claim rohani did.. then u r wrong..
I choose zirah... u want to hate us, go ahead!! but dun blame my gf... she tk knal u!!
blame me!! i will take responsibilty...
And anythin happen to zirah, and if it is bcos of u!! I promise myself , i will give u bad dreams till the day u lost ur everything...

U wanna play game, i join u..

You betta get lost!!

~Complicated~

2009-06-06T22:52:00.000-07:00

She Make Me Realise That Love Needs Sacrifices..

And She Did That

All of you guys know tt my gf is my everything... No matter how mad i am, i wont let my gf feel the pain..

But yesterday was a diff. story.. i hurt her...

I wanna ask her out, bcos i miss her.. its been 2 wks since i last held her in my arms.. So this fuckin guy is missing his princess... So i ask her out..

And she got scolded from her mama bcos of Me!! BCOS OF ZAIE....

Im really sorry... I ask her out bcos i rarely see her.. Im in Ns, my life is only On Sat..

Mon-Fri.. I have to serve my country..

Actually i dun mind servin my country, if im in Bukit Panjang Camp.. my book out day is on friday afternoon..

I can meet My Zirah afer that.. but now in this fucking camp.. i bookout on Sat.. And my gf can kuar on tt day..

Im goin to finish my course by the end of the month i hope.. I dun want bcos of this course i cant meet my Baby..

wish me all the best...

I love u Zirah...

~Only You~

2009-05-31T03:37:00.000-07:00

~Friends, i will help~

2009-05-31T03:25:00.000-07:00

This is life.. No matter how happy we are it wont be long.. Sooner or later heavy rain will come down pouring!! I understand how she feel...

Before i continue i will like to gif a kiss to my one and only princess in my heart...
Hazirah... Baby i mis u...

Ok lets start... Harnee is my ex gf..she used to be the regular name in my blog.. But both of us are now frewns..
Im not a guy yg will run away from my ex.. if they want my help.. i'll help but first my princess must give me the permission first..
I told my princess about harnee prob.. And shes so sweet, she give me tips so tt i can help my frewn.. tts why i love her...

Remember harnee, i do my best to help u...
Tke cre...

Zirah, Zaie loves you...

Baby when nk g couple lap?? I want to buy couple ring for both of us...

MIZ U!

~This Is For My Baby~

2009-05-24T01:12:00.000-07:00

Well my dear.. i created something just now for you... Well its not that good but..
I hope you like it..

I try to be a person

That i never thought i'll be..

When the sunlight from your eyes

Just keep shining right through me..

I never feel this special

And i never wanna lie..

All this time we spent together

Those were my dreams i had inside..

But if we have to be apart..

Just let me stay here in your heart..

Cause im lost and i only need you..

And if you have to go away..

Will i survive the next day..

Cause i cant fight this life without you..

(Chorus)

Where would i be

If shes not here...

How will i sing this song

for her...

I dont wanna lose this girl..

I dont wanna lose my world...

Baby dah dgr kn td?? hehe i love u

~Forgive Me~

2009-05-23T19:02:00.000-07:00

Im Sorry tt i hurt you!! Im sorry tt i shout at you!! Im sorry tt i have doubts about you!!

Im just a jerk.. i wish tt you would forgive me.. cos i cant imagine being away from you!!

You are my girl... I promise i'll b betta for US!! I need you now, you are different from My ex..

You were there for me when im sad, when im strugglin in camp... You were there to take my hand and dance.... You were there when i need someone to cry on!! You were always there for me... Sorry if i say the harshest thing... But dun punish me like this!! I cant imagine being far from my throne... My kingdom...

I'll b a betta Zaie... I mis you too...

Thx for the honour, for sayin im the best kisser...

You're the hottest babe tt i had ever sit with...

You're so cute when you smile... And i like your manja attitude..

hehe... You get jealous when i puji any pompan.. eventhough tt woman is just a picture in a magazine.. but im happy, i know you dun want me to go away from you..

Me too... I dun want to be far from you Zirah...

Plz... forgive me...

I LOVE YOU!!!

~3 Tonner~

2009-05-23T18:58:00.000-07:00

Fuh... i had started to drive 3 tonner already... for you guys who dun know what is it!! it is actually the Army lory tt some of you guys see around bdok, tamp and pasir ris..

Ya i drove tt thing!! can you imagine... but its a great experience.. Drivin tt big vehicle in the middle of a bz road!! i must be crazy... My final test is on 5 June!! Kasumi Dear, i need your support in this hehe... Hope tt i pass this test, and be free from Sembawang Camp..

Cos i can die, die of missing you...

~She Owns The Throne~

2009-05-16T23:28:00.001-07:00

I was lost but i found my way out...

Life in sembawang camp is so stressful, i miss my camp in Bukit Panjang...
Ya i know sembawang camp is damn near to Kasumi's house.. But my book out day is on Sat..

Shes always busy on tt day.. but wat to say.. its just her life...

But im happy being with her, shes so independent.. being the oldest and the fairest of them all...

Im glad that she accept my hand and lead her to the dance singing 'Insomnia'...

Im tired of my driving course i get fcuked almost everyday...!! Mum and Kasumi always remind me to be strong.. I tried, but everytime im strong, the curses becomes stronger and soon caught me unprepared... It almost push me down the road.. Thats why Kasumi's voice warms me all nite... It make me sleep soundly in peace.. Just imagining her besides me whispering to my ears, my eyes felt weaker and weaker... She'll be loved...Stay beautiful ur highness...

I just hope to be out of Sembawang Camp by early July...
I wanna celebrate my birthday with Kasumi's... candlelight dinner by the park...

Tellin her how greatful i am to b with her... If i just keep my mouth shut..

She will also know how much i mean to her...

Im Proud of you Ur highness...

You Can have the Throne...

Love.

2009-05-16T22:56:00.000-07:00

Kasumi, I love you (: